You vs a Tour de France Rider - how do you stack up?

A Bicycling Magazine feature this week asks the question all of us Tour de France couch jockeys have asked ourselves--how would we fare if we suddenly found ourselves in the middle of a pro peloton:

IMG_8734 Tour of Missouri Peloton at Hermann, Missouri


Average speed on flat terrain     17–18 mph     25–28 mph      
Average speed on mountainous terrain     9–10 mph     21–25 mph      
Estimated average watts at threshold3     170–220     405–450      
Miles ridden in a week     75–140     700–800      
Flat tires over the course of 3 weeks     One or less     4–5      
Hours of sleep a week     40–50     70      


OK--so we don't hold up all that well . . . Maybe I can only charge up our Raytown hills at 4 MPH, but at least I'm enjoying my mere 50 hours of sleep per week.

How to you stack up? Let us know what you think in the comments.